Thursday, July 09, 2009

Let's Play the Lawyer Eyes game

The title is inspired by Chef Jr (soon to be a Double Digit Dude), who wanted to play the Lawyer Eyes game tonight. You'll understand why soon.

When we first moved to Florida, it astounded us how many billboards have pictures of the professional who is advertising for business. As long as I've had the blog, I have been thinking I needed to take pictures of some of these billboards, because they probably do the opposite of what the professional intended.

For instance, there is a lawyer who we call the "Possessed by the devil axe murdering lawyer" because he is not smiling a warm, welcoming smile in supersize on these signs. Rather, his expression says "I am going to cut you up into little pieces when I'm done taking the picture."

Sorry, if you can't smile with your eyes as well as your mouth, stick with the stoic look. (Maybe he looks harmless in small, pixelated form. Imagine this in 5 foot by 5 foot, staring DOWN at you while you wait for that traffic light to turn green. It's creepy)

For the past five years, any time we go past this guy's signs, we end up laughing at the scary lawyer eyes. There are other lawyers in the area who have billboards with less than flattering pictures, but this guy's picture doesn't inspire the thought that we just have to call him before anyone else for our legal needs.

The problem isn't exclusive to lawyers around here. When you're driving down the interstate at 70 or so miles an hour, this doctor's picture makes him look like Attila from the local prison.

Granted, when it's here in small form, the guy looks decent, but when his picture is blown up supersize, he looks intimidating. Not the kind of guy you want holding a scalpel to parts of your body, KWIM?

There are more examples that I should get pictures of the billboards to further support the argument that it might be better to stick with text and graphics in the large, impersonal advertising media.

Which brings me to playing the Lawyer Eyes game. Chef is a champion at staring you down. However, lately, he's taken great pleasure in duplicating the possessed or scary looks that stare down form the local billboards. While we were waiting for Ed tonight, he trotted out these expressions and said "Let's Play the Lawyer Eyes game."

He beat the pants off of me, because I was laughing so hard at how close to the expressions he was.

Should I be worried?




4 People talked back:

LceeL said...

I can scare the pants off of SWMBO anytime I like - just by giving her the 'scarey eyes' look. It's my Ace in the Hole.

songbird's crazy world said...

Is that a lawyer, or a shark?

Or is there a difference?(I'm allowed to make lawyer jokes...)

Suzanne said...

Lou, I thought that might be the other way around, seeing as she IS SWMBO!

SB, You can make all the lawyer jokes you want. I thought you'd get a good laugh at him, especially since all he knows of lawyers is their pictures on billboards around here!

ligirl said...

That second guy is the vasectomy guy!!!! Would ANY guy want him anywhere NEAR his junk? LOL